Free will is tricky

The whole issue of free will is a tricky one. When we are seeking Christ every day, striving to look more like Him and less like our sinful selves, free will isn't really a big deal. When we are seeking to have our will resemble His, He will transform our desires and our will. Making decisions in that aspect is a no brainer. Does it follow with what the Bible says? Do I feel something from the Holy Spirit telling me this isn't a good idea? Our "yes" and our "no" come from seeking God first.

But, what about a person who is in Christ but has walked away from Him and is not seeking out His will? When my husband was having an affair, he fell into this category. I even remember saying, "I am begging God for His will for me and for Scott and for our marriage! But, Scott is not. He is living out of his own free will. He can choose to do whatever in the world he wants. What if he doesn't listen to God?" In this time where I felt completely out of control because the rest of my own life and the life of my children was being chosen by someone who was not seeking God, all I could do was rest in the peace of God and ask Him for His will in my life. And I asked Him to change Scott's heart. I didn't know how it would work, but I believed it would.

In Proverbs 16, it says three different times that basically we as people can make our own choices, but God ultimately has the final say. In verse 1 it says, "We can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer" and verse 9 says it even better, "We can make our own plans, but the Lord determines our steps." I fully believe that everything happens because God allows it to pass through His hand. If He doesn't want it to happen, it won't. Even the hard things He allows, and there is always a higher purpose, a greater story than our own hurt in the moment. These two verses, and the third in verse 33, say exactly what I have suspected all along. We can make our plans, but at the point that God says "No", they change. In my situation, Scott's plans were for a divorce and for a relationship with the other woman. I would not accept that this was God's will for our marriage, so I prayed that His will would come to fruition. And in His timing and in His way, God said, "No". God changed Scott's heart over time. He literally took Scott's heart, his feelings and his thoughts, and He changed them! He has the ultimate power, even over our free will.

If you are in a situation where you feel hopeless because someone you love is not seeking God, rest in the peace that God still has the final answer. Pray for God's will in His timing, and leave the rest to Him!