We sat together, my good friend and I, enjoying the cool air (that a few weeks ago we considered hot!) after eating some yummy dinner. We talked about kids and marriage and life, and I said, "I just wish it would be consistently good. Why is it that we have days that are effortlessly great and days that really just take work? Scott and I can have a really great day, and then something happens the next day and it seems like we are having to work through a conflict. Wouldn't it be nice if it wasn't so hard?"
And then today, sitting outside reading the Word and listening to the birds call to each other, He reminded me that, yeah, it is hard, and by the way, He already said it was going to be.
Romans 8:15-17 "So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God's Spirit when He adopted you as His own children. Now we call Him, "Abba, Father." For His Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God's children. And since we are His children, we are His heirs. In fact, together with Christ we are heirs of God's glory. But if we are to share in His glory, we must also share in His suffering."
The Study Bible says about these verses "Jesus is heir to all of God's promises, and as those who belong to Jesus, we share with Him in that glorious inheritance. However, just as it was for Jesus, our path to glory is also marked by suffering. We experience the difficulties that come from striving to live righteously in a world dominated by sin."
Life is hard because there is a real struggle in our souls between what we ought to do (living righteously) and what we want to do (the cravings of our sinful nature). God's original law, though good and right, only served to show the people what they were doing wrong. It didn't bring with it any means to stop doing the wrong. That's where Jesus came in. With His death and resurrection, we are given His Spirit, and the Spirit lives in us, enabling us to choose not to be slaves to our sinful nature and to walk righteously. By His grace and power, may I strive to have more and more days where I choose not my sinful nature, but His righteousness.
Showing posts with label character. Show all posts
Showing posts with label character. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Monday, June 4, 2012
The sweet fragrance of pain
Song of Songs 4:16: Awake, north wind, and come, south wind! Blow on my garden, that it's fragrance may be spread abroad.
Some of the spices and plants mentioned in verse 14 of the above chapter are very descriptive and symbolic. The juice of the aloe plant has a bitter taste but is soothing when applied to the skin, so it tells us of the sweetness of bitter things, the bittersweet, having an important application that only those who have used it will understand. Myrrh is symbolic of death, having been used to embalm the dead. It represents the sweetness that comes to the heart after it has died to self-will, pride, and sin.
What inexpressible charm seems to encircle some Christians, simply because they carry upon their pure countenance and gentle spirit the imprint of the cross! It is the holy evidence of having died to something that was once proud and strong but is now forever surrendered at the feet of Jesus. And it is also the heavenly charm of a broken spirit and contrite heart, the beautiful music that rises from a minor key, and the sweetness brought about by the touch of frost on ripened fruit.
Finally, frankincense was a fragrance that arose only after being touched with fire. The burning incense became clouds of sweetness arising from the heat of the flames. It symbolizes a person's heart whose sweetness has been brought forth by the flames of affliction until the holy, innermost part of the soul is filled with clouds of praise and prayer.
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Dear friends, sometimes God allows us to experience pain in our lives because He knows it is what we need to grow, to bloom, as in the pruning of a rose bush. Sometimes the pain helps us to see things in a whole new light, and allows us to become a blessing to someone else.
Are you in pain today? Grasp ahold of our Heavenly Father's hand, and let Him guide you through the bitter to the other side, where the sweet fragrance of pain lies. Let it fill you with praise and prayer.
Monday, April 30, 2012
of wisdom
(I will begin this and every blog
post about what I am finding in the Bible about being a Godly wife,
mother, and woman by saying that I by no means think that the woman is
always the culprit in an unhealthy relationship. Marriages involve two
broken, sinning humans who carry equal responsibility in making their
relationship work. What I have had to learn the hard way, however, is
that the only person I can control is myself. If there is an issue in my
marriage, the only things I can do are seek God's insight on how I can
be or do better, and pray that God will do the work in my husband's
heart. So please read on with that in mind.)
Proverbs 14:1 "A wise woman builds her house, but with her own hand a foolish one tears hers down."
Wisdom seems to be an elusive thing to define, but the Bible gives a lot of examples of how a wise person acts. The Bible is also clear on the source of wisdom. Psalm 111:10 "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow His precepts have good understanding." Col 2: 2 & 3 "My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge." God is the source of wisdom. A wise woman is wise because she has been seeking God, learning and loving His precepts. James 1:5 "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God..." If you are facing a situation where you don't know the answer and you don't know which way to go, seek God. Ask Him for the wisdom to go in the direction that He is leading you, and He will be faithful to answer (in His time and way).
The Bible also has a lot to say about what foolishness is. I Corinthians 2: 19 "For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God's sight." What is the foolishness of this world? Basically anything the world says that goes against what the Bible says, and boy there's a lot of it! The world says that to be successful you must have money, beauty, the newest gadgets out there, the best computer, and the fastest phone. You must be beautiful and fit and you certainly must never let it show that you don't have it all together. To show that you are suffering or lacking in some way is to show weakness. The wisdom of Christ is "God first." The wisdom of the world is "me first, and boy you'd better not get in my way!" The Bible calls that foolishness.
A foolish woman is consumed with the world. She may love the Lord, but she loves things, the world, and/or herself more. She makes decisions based on her own comfort and desires. Unless you are daily spending time with God and in the Word, learning His precepts and loving His laws, it is easy to become this woman. Unfortunately, the consequence is that her choices and behavior act to tear down her home and her relationships with her husband and children, instead of make them stronger. A wise woman, therefore, seeks God in every aspect of her life. She acknowledges Him first, and offers up herself, her husband, her children, and her home to Him. She makes decisions prayerfully, and she builds a home that honors God.
Wisdom seems to be an elusive thing to define, but the Bible gives a lot of examples of how a wise person acts. The Bible is also clear on the source of wisdom. Psalm 111:10 "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow His precepts have good understanding." Col 2: 2 & 3 "My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge." God is the source of wisdom. A wise woman is wise because she has been seeking God, learning and loving His precepts. James 1:5 "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God..." If you are facing a situation where you don't know the answer and you don't know which way to go, seek God. Ask Him for the wisdom to go in the direction that He is leading you, and He will be faithful to answer (in His time and way).
The Bible also has a lot to say about what foolishness is. I Corinthians 2: 19 "For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God's sight." What is the foolishness of this world? Basically anything the world says that goes against what the Bible says, and boy there's a lot of it! The world says that to be successful you must have money, beauty, the newest gadgets out there, the best computer, and the fastest phone. You must be beautiful and fit and you certainly must never let it show that you don't have it all together. To show that you are suffering or lacking in some way is to show weakness. The wisdom of Christ is "God first." The wisdom of the world is "me first, and boy you'd better not get in my way!" The Bible calls that foolishness.
A foolish woman is consumed with the world. She may love the Lord, but she loves things, the world, and/or herself more. She makes decisions based on her own comfort and desires. Unless you are daily spending time with God and in the Word, learning His precepts and loving His laws, it is easy to become this woman. Unfortunately, the consequence is that her choices and behavior act to tear down her home and her relationships with her husband and children, instead of make them stronger. A wise woman, therefore, seeks God in every aspect of her life. She acknowledges Him first, and offers up herself, her husband, her children, and her home to Him. She makes decisions prayerfully, and she builds a home that honors God.
Saturday, April 28, 2012
of noble character
(I will begin this and every blog post about what I am finding in the Bible about being a Godly wife, mother, and woman by saying that I by no means think that the woman is always the culprit in an unhealthy relationship. Marriages involve two broken, sinning humans who carry equal responsibility in making their relationship work. What I have had to learn the hard way, however, is that the only person I can control is myself. If there is an issue in my marriage, the only things I can do are seek God's insight on how I can be or do better, and pray that God will do the work in my husband's heart. So please read on with that in mind.)
Proverbs 12:4 "A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones."
Decay in the bones slowly and painfully eats away at you until you are left completely and utterly disabled, defeated, and in constant discomfort. It is not a surprise, then, that the Bible uses this analogy to describe the effect on a husband who has a disgraceful wife. In real life terms, this is the wife who is constantly harping at or belittling her husband. The wife makes a disrespectful or snooty comment, and there is an unmistakable look on her husband's face of disbelief (did you really just say that?), discouragement (do you really think I'm as stupid or incapable as you came across?), and pain (wow, that hurt!). When this happens, he may initially stand up for himself by arguing back or by telling her that he doesn't appreciate the way she was talking to him. Usually, though, this just makes her more angry and venomous, unless she has learned to control her tongue.
Over time, the husband realizes that nothing he could say will help, and he stops trying to protect himself against her words. This is the husband who "stonewalls" when his wife wants to have a "discussion" about something that is bothering her. He has lost the energy and the desire to even try because he knows how it will end - with him feeling belittled, disrespected, and defeated. This has played out in my own marriage. I used to have horrible control of my tongue and would make snarky, cynical comments without even considering or caring how they made my husband feel. I was too caught up in how I was feeling in the moment to consider him. Fortunately, I was forced to face how I was treating him. I took a good look at how I was using my words and my feelings and realized that they were not in line with how the Bible calls me to act (towards my husband and people in general). Once my husband felt free to express how he had been feeling without the threat of retaliatory words (I have at times literally had to force my mouth to stay shut), he was able to tell me how I had been making him feel. It's ironic, but I had always wanted him to be the strong, dependable leader of our home, but I was creating the opposite with my words.
Recently, I was struggling a bit emotionally and briefly lost control of my tongue a few times. I can still see it in my mind: the look of disbelief in his eyes, the slight lowering of his shoulders, the almost imperceptible sigh and shake of his head. I knew I had crossed the line, and I should have apologized. Unfortunately, I didn't. Later on in the car, he was a little quiet. Finally, he said, "Can I be honest with you about something?" Immediately and impulsively, my ire went up. But, I pushed it back down and said, "Yes." He went on, "I have felt a little disrespected by some of your comments lately." Again came up the ire along with, "well, I've been tired, stressed, grumpy..." but I swallowed it back down and said, "I know, and I'm sorry for treating you like that." It wasn't a fun conversation for either of us, but it was necessary. He was able to be real with me without getting ripped apart, and I was reminded that I need to keep my temper in check and really pay attention to how I am making him feel with my words.
So, then, what does it look like to have a noble character? Ruth was described in the Bible as being a woman of noble character. Ruth 3:11 "All my fellow townsmen know that you are a woman of noble character." Ruth's story is a beautiful one to study. She experienced the pain of losing her husband and her father-in-law, of having nothing and no one but her mother-in-law (who wanted to leave Ruth's town to go back to the town she and her deceased husband and sons came from), facing the unknown of going with her mother-in-law to a town and religion she didn't know, and finally redemption. Through it all, she exuded a character that became known by everyone around as being noble and honorable. Ruth was fiercely devoted. Even when it was tough and the easy thing to do would have been to go back to her father's house, Ruth remained faithful by staying with her mother-in-law. Naomi even tried to convince Ruth to leave her, but Ruth said, "Don't urge me to leave you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God..." (1:16). Ruth was also humble. When she and Naomi arrived, Ruth immediately began doing what she could so that she and Naomi would have food to eat. At Naomi's instruction, Ruth went into the field of a man named Boaz and began to glean what she could from the ground behind the workers who were harvesting Boaz's barley. This is the position of a beggar, although it didn't stop Ruth. Ruth was a hard worker. In response to Boaz inquiring about Ruth, one of his men said, "she went into the field and has worked steadily from morning till now, except for a short rest in the shelter" (2:7). Finally, Ruth's reputation preceded her. She was a foreigner, so people were naturally going to be curious of her. She was watched and was found to be an extraordinary woman. Boaz was both kind and gracious to her. When Boaz and Ruth were finally able to sit together, she asked him why she had found such favor in his eyes. He responded, "I've been told all about what you have done for your mother-in-law...May the Lord repay you for what you have done: (2: 10, 11). And God did repay Ruth, for she was in the maternal line of Kind David!
A man who has a wife like that is rich in blessing. I want to be that kind of wife! Neither women or men are perfect, but if we each try to mold and shape our character to be more noble, we will become blessings to our spouses, and we will make them want to stand tall, proud and strong!
Decay in the bones slowly and painfully eats away at you until you are left completely and utterly disabled, defeated, and in constant discomfort. It is not a surprise, then, that the Bible uses this analogy to describe the effect on a husband who has a disgraceful wife. In real life terms, this is the wife who is constantly harping at or belittling her husband. The wife makes a disrespectful or snooty comment, and there is an unmistakable look on her husband's face of disbelief (did you really just say that?), discouragement (do you really think I'm as stupid or incapable as you came across?), and pain (wow, that hurt!). When this happens, he may initially stand up for himself by arguing back or by telling her that he doesn't appreciate the way she was talking to him. Usually, though, this just makes her more angry and venomous, unless she has learned to control her tongue.
Over time, the husband realizes that nothing he could say will help, and he stops trying to protect himself against her words. This is the husband who "stonewalls" when his wife wants to have a "discussion" about something that is bothering her. He has lost the energy and the desire to even try because he knows how it will end - with him feeling belittled, disrespected, and defeated. This has played out in my own marriage. I used to have horrible control of my tongue and would make snarky, cynical comments without even considering or caring how they made my husband feel. I was too caught up in how I was feeling in the moment to consider him. Fortunately, I was forced to face how I was treating him. I took a good look at how I was using my words and my feelings and realized that they were not in line with how the Bible calls me to act (towards my husband and people in general). Once my husband felt free to express how he had been feeling without the threat of retaliatory words (I have at times literally had to force my mouth to stay shut), he was able to tell me how I had been making him feel. It's ironic, but I had always wanted him to be the strong, dependable leader of our home, but I was creating the opposite with my words.
Recently, I was struggling a bit emotionally and briefly lost control of my tongue a few times. I can still see it in my mind: the look of disbelief in his eyes, the slight lowering of his shoulders, the almost imperceptible sigh and shake of his head. I knew I had crossed the line, and I should have apologized. Unfortunately, I didn't. Later on in the car, he was a little quiet. Finally, he said, "Can I be honest with you about something?" Immediately and impulsively, my ire went up. But, I pushed it back down and said, "Yes." He went on, "I have felt a little disrespected by some of your comments lately." Again came up the ire along with, "well, I've been tired, stressed, grumpy..." but I swallowed it back down and said, "I know, and I'm sorry for treating you like that." It wasn't a fun conversation for either of us, but it was necessary. He was able to be real with me without getting ripped apart, and I was reminded that I need to keep my temper in check and really pay attention to how I am making him feel with my words.
So, then, what does it look like to have a noble character? Ruth was described in the Bible as being a woman of noble character. Ruth 3:11 "All my fellow townsmen know that you are a woman of noble character." Ruth's story is a beautiful one to study. She experienced the pain of losing her husband and her father-in-law, of having nothing and no one but her mother-in-law (who wanted to leave Ruth's town to go back to the town she and her deceased husband and sons came from), facing the unknown of going with her mother-in-law to a town and religion she didn't know, and finally redemption. Through it all, she exuded a character that became known by everyone around as being noble and honorable. Ruth was fiercely devoted. Even when it was tough and the easy thing to do would have been to go back to her father's house, Ruth remained faithful by staying with her mother-in-law. Naomi even tried to convince Ruth to leave her, but Ruth said, "Don't urge me to leave you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God..." (1:16). Ruth was also humble. When she and Naomi arrived, Ruth immediately began doing what she could so that she and Naomi would have food to eat. At Naomi's instruction, Ruth went into the field of a man named Boaz and began to glean what she could from the ground behind the workers who were harvesting Boaz's barley. This is the position of a beggar, although it didn't stop Ruth. Ruth was a hard worker. In response to Boaz inquiring about Ruth, one of his men said, "she went into the field and has worked steadily from morning till now, except for a short rest in the shelter" (2:7). Finally, Ruth's reputation preceded her. She was a foreigner, so people were naturally going to be curious of her. She was watched and was found to be an extraordinary woman. Boaz was both kind and gracious to her. When Boaz and Ruth were finally able to sit together, she asked him why she had found such favor in his eyes. He responded, "I've been told all about what you have done for your mother-in-law...May the Lord repay you for what you have done: (2: 10, 11). And God did repay Ruth, for she was in the maternal line of Kind David!
A man who has a wife like that is rich in blessing. I want to be that kind of wife! Neither women or men are perfect, but if we each try to mold and shape our character to be more noble, we will become blessings to our spouses, and we will make them want to stand tall, proud and strong!
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