From my kitchen Friday

Today in my kitchen, I am making yogurt and bread, watching out the back as my kids make and play in mud, and trying to find my way back to normal after being gone most of the last two weeks. Have a great weekend! Things will resume as normal next week :)

Letting go, being free to laugh

We spent our Saturday, really our only free day in the middle of two very un-ordinary and busy weeks, busy with outside work. Out early in the morning, the kids helped me weed the garden and plant three new rows of beans while Scott mowed the yard, and then Scott and the kids did some serious playing while I staked up my last three tomato plants.

After several hours of work, we were all sun kissed, tired, and sweaty. I was putting the finishing touches on the last tomato plant, and out of no where came a blast of cold water all over my back. I regained my stolen breath as my husband laughed and said, "you didn't even hear me coming!"

It seems, in life, that there are always moments that can either go tremendously well, or tremendously not well. Unfortunately, in the past I have chosen too many times to react in the "not well" manner. I think it even got to the point where my husband quit trying to laugh and joke with me because I was always so serious all of the time, and he decided that the risk wasn't worth putting himself on the line.

In the moment after he blasted me with the frigid hose water, I wonder if he held his breath, hoping that I would react well. When I could speak again, I screeched out that the water was freezing, and then laughed out that, yeah, I had NO idea he was coming. By then our children had caught on, came running, and proceeded to get blasted with the water hose as well.

We all took turns, then, spraying each other and being sprayed, tensing up as the cold water came our way, knowing it would take our breath away. Remi was in her element, and we waited patiently as she took her turn, trying to figure out how to get the sprayer to work with only one fully functioning hand. A few times, amid the squeals of delight from our children and ourselves, soaked to the bone and running through the water, Scott and I looked at each other and laughed. I am so glad that I chose to let go of the serious for a time and felt free to laugh.

Life seems to be much fuller of times that are carefree and full of joy when you can let go a little, and be free to laugh!

Friday ("Cool dude!")

Sometimes, in the midst of the craziness, you just have to stop and laugh and make the most of your time together. I will take a lesson from my baby girl, who took everything yesterday (which included visits to a doctor as well as the hospital, four different waiting rooms, and x-rays all within the span of 2 hours) with the utmost of grace. Such a trooper she was, and still is :)

I hope you have a blessed weekend! And thank you to anyone who has said prayers for my son, and now daughter also :)

My children are not my own

My mind and heart spin. Round and round they go with anger, frustration, worry, mostly anger.

My boy has something wrong and everyone is sending me in circles, with no end in near sight. I tell myself all the Truth that I know. God is bigger than this. He already knows the answers. I have learned that I can trust Him with everything, including my boy. And still He leads me.

I lift up trembling hands, offering it up to Him. If I could leave it there at His feet then I wouldn't be in the emotionally and physically wound situation that I'm in. The problem is that then I take it back. He's my boy. And then I remember that he was His boy first.

And then he looks at me and smiles and says, "I love you, Mommy. More than you know I do." And then he's my boy and I'm picking him up and hugging him close and he's got his arms around me, playing with my hair. And I'm melting, and I'm frustrated, because the people who control this situation are telling me that there really is not so much a situation as I think there is.

And then I remember that really He controls this situation, and round and round I go.

And now I choose to stop. I choose to remember that my boy isn't really mine. And even if I have to tell myself the same thing over and over and over, I will remember that in Him lies the future of my son.  

In this world I will have trouble, Hudson will have trouble, but we can be encouraged because He has overcome the world (John 16:33). And because He has, in Him we have. So I will take it to His feet and leave it there. And I will rest in His calming presence, as His peace guards my heart and my mind (Matthew 11:28, Philippians 4:7).
 
"Bless the Lord, O my soul, O my soul. Worship His Holy name. Sing like never before, O my soul, I'll worship Your Holy name. The sun comes up, it's a new day dawning. It's time to sing Your song again. Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me, let me be singing when the evening comes." 10,000 Reasons by Matt Redman

And we won't even go into the fact that this morning I have to take Remi to the doctor because she did something to her thumb and now it is stuck bent and won't straighten out...

The marriage garden

I was hunched down, the sun hot on my back, picking at the little garden weeds to get them out of there before they became a big problem. I glanced over my little garden, ripe with possibility in new growth. I thought about what it will look like in another several weeks compared to now, and then at the end of the summer in all it's fullness, spent of all it's offerings. How will my tending to it compare then to now?

The answer came quick, knowledge gleaned from seasons past. In a few weeks, in the hot middle of summer, and in the coolness of Fall, my tending to this garden will be much the same. I will pull the weeds before they become too big to handle. I will surround my tender vegetables with plants that will attract bugs that are beneficial to the veggies. I will quickly get rid of bugs that will destroy my veggies. I will water it. I will prune it. I will fill it with nourishment from grass cuttings and kitchen scraps.

The fact that the plants and flowers get older and more mature doesn't mean that they become immune to disease and death. In fact, the very thing that will bring disease and death is neglect from me. So I will water even when I don't feel like watering. I will not despair after a particularly hot day leaves things wilty, I will just add a little more watering. I will pull the weeds even though it is hard, hot work, and I will do it before they become big with deep roots. I will destroy any thing that poses a threat to the growth of my precious garden. And if for some reason the weeds do get big and deep, or a particular plant seems to be struggling, I will do what is necessary to fix it.

 And when I say, as I often do, that marriage is like a garden, this is exactly what I am talking about. No marriage, whether new or old, is immune to disease. No marriage can go without daily watering, nourishing, weeding, and pruning for long before it becomes overgrown and diseased. Every marriage, whether new or old, experiences really hot days where they are left feeling wilted. Every marriage benefits from having other couples around who are for their marriage and seek to encourage in that area. Every marriage, when properly tended to, yields fruit and blessing to everyone around them. Because just like a garden, the very thing that will bring disease and death to a marriage is neglect. And just like a garden, there will be weeds that pop up and threaten your marriage.

So I will daily seek to water and tend to the fertile ground of my marriage. And I will trust that the fruit that is produced will be a blessing to everyone around us.

And  I encourage you to do the same :) You, your marriage, your spouse, your children, and the people around you will notice, and will be blessed.
 

From my Kitchen Friday: Calzones!

Friday night is Pizza night, and after several different attempts I have yet to find a really good pizza crust recipe. But, I have found an awesome calzone recipe, and for the last several weeks we have had them on Pizza night. It is so yummy, and since we each get our own, the kids get to pick what they want and make their own.

You want to know the secret? The dough is made in the bread machine, so it's so simple!

Have a great weekend!

I'm sorry

I lifted her up onto the potty, short as she is. As I sat her down she said, "sorry, Mommy." I thought she thought she had hurt me, and I said, "It's okay, Baby, you didn't hurt me." Then she grimaced a little and started rubbing her chest, and I realized that I had hurt her. Feeling bad that I must have squeezed her a little too hard when lifting her up, I told her that I was sorry.

This is a very common thing for her. Whether she is the one doing the hurting or the one being hurt, she always says, "sorry." This is even how we realize sometimes that we have hurt her, like when I lifted her onto the potty.

I started thinking about how willing she is to say, "I'm sorry," even when she doesn't need to, and how unwilling adults tend to be, especially when they do need to. As adults, when we get into an argument with someone, whether family or friend, we rarely are the first to apologize. We keep a list of our hurts, whether intentionally or not, and we wait for the other person to fess up and apologize before we offer our apology or forgiveness.

How much better would it make our relationships if, when faced with a hurt, we would be the first to bring up what is going on, talk it through, and apologize for our part in the problem? Even in cases where we have been unjustly wronged, with Christ's help we can still take steps toward reconciling that relationship. Instead of wasting days, or weeks, or years holding tightly to that hurt, we need to take the initiative to bring healing to that relationship if we can.

If a two year old can manage it, shouldn't we?